The Not-So Complete (Or Nice) List of Things Angelica Has Called Me

I like to think I’m a nice person. I don’t litter, I smile at strangers…(sometimes, but mostly to creep them out), and I sometimes wave at the people ringing bells outside of grocery stores. I’m agreeable in my indecisiveness, easy to talk to, and quick with a laugh…despite the fact that it’s usually at whoever I’m talking to…which is often Angelica.

Angelica, my dear best friend of epic best friend proportions, can be very quirky. She takes issue with the strangest things, yet, I persevere because I love her so. Seriously though, she gets mad over some weird stuff. For example, taking random pictures over my shoulder when we’re in the store.

I left her hair in the pictures so you’d know where she was.

She also does not like it, for some weird reason, when you take her picture and do a side-by-side comparison to Corey Stoll.

And this particular picture of her cat.

So maybe I get busted taking the occasional picture…she used to let me, I don’t know what happened…

Happy, simpler times…

Though I try to be the bestest best friend, I still take considerable flack…Here’s a small sampling of some of the completely unwarranted names I’ve been called:


 An Egg

How does one ever deserve to be called this?

A Very Small Burrito

Like, not even one of those yummy overstuffed ones. I imagine this is some lame skinny burrito that’s mostly tortilla filled with the remains of beans and food poisoning.

I’m apparently not this burrito

via GIPHY 

A Cult Classic

Thank you?

A Rejected Bid

This came from a communications class we took during our Associates degree. A rejected bid is when someone reaches out to another and said other person turns it down. Like when I run to Angelica and tell her to catch me….and she doesn’t…



No Fun at All

Apparently on this day I was the opposite of fun. The absence of fun. Funless.


An Easy A

I’d like to think that this meant I was perfectly clear in instruction…but I don’t think that’s what she meant.

On The List

Angelica has many lists. Not all of them are good. I remember specifically that this was not one of the good ones.



An Obnoxious Twit

The worst kind of twit.

An Excessive Self-Wooter

It is acceptable to “woot” in excitement for having accomplished something.


Any more than that and you have over wooted.


A Small Whiteboard

I’m not even big enough to be one of those full scale ones that really smart people write on.


I mean, really, what on earth does one have to do to be called this? I don’t remember the circumstance, but I imagine it was pretty bad.

College Essay

I think this means I’m smart and well thought out…though it could mean that I have one-inch margins and contain a lot of fluff…


So there it is, the incomplete list. There will be more. There’s always more.

She’ll definitely call me a name when she sees this. And since she can post comments without my approval, omg…she can post comments without my approval! What have I done?



About Melynda

Writer, student, reckless blogger, dreamer and an aficionado of all things funny or caffeinated.

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